Paul Answers the Haunting Question: ‘Why Am I Still Doing This?’
Have any of you out there ever woken up and wondered "why am I still doing all this"?
It seems like I am having those thoughts more and more. Don't get me wrong, I love what I do but sometimes you get so frustrated with all the battles you have to fight and sometimes you want to throw in the towel.
I was thinking yesterday about how I have been going full steam ahead since we got back from the Flakes trip the first week of February. Outside of a wedding in May, there really hasn't been much time for anything else. Combine that with what in the hell is going on in this country and you just want to say, "Screw it, why do all this..."
Then I start thinking about my kids and what I hope to leave them when I'm gone and it keeps me going. I get to check my cattle water and get a big breath of fresh green cool Montana air and it helps to clear my mind and head and more importantly keep me focused.
It's funny what a nice calm dog with a smooth-haired face can do to a guy when you rub his ears and he's so appreciative, that helps too.
I am constantly preaching every day in the early morning for people to keep their heads up, and keep fighting, it's all worth it. Sometimes I question that myself.
I'm struggling but I'm fighting.
I keep remembering what my dad told me all the time: "Son, in the words of General Patton, 'Don't let the bastards get you down'," or something like that.
So, I'll still see ya tomorrow at 5 a.m.